February 16, 1951 – September 11, 2013

Because he was truly beloved by many, it was felt that this blog post should be put up rapidly.
Please know that Scott passed in complete peace in his sleep this morning and was conscious throughout the day yesterday.
He was smiling. He was loving. He was blowing kisses to Katy. He was singing Happy Birthday to his nurse. He was in a good space, he said.
He did Smile 2 the End.


Lotus © Scott Morgan 2013

Rainier Maria Rilke: The First Elegy

Who, if I cried out, would hear me among the Angelic

Orders? And even if one were to suddenly

take me to its heart, I would vanish into its

stronger existence. For beauty is nothing but

the beginning of terror, that we are still able to bear,

and we revere it so, because it calmly disdains

to destroy us. Every Angel is terror.

And so I hold myself back and swallow the cry

of a darkened sobbing. Ah, who then can

we make use of? Not Angels: not men,

and the resourceful creatures see clearly

that we are not really at home

in the interpreted world. Perhaps there remains

some tree on a slope, that we can see

again each day: there remains to us yesterday’s street,

and the thinned-out loyalty of a habit

that liked us, and so stayed, and never departed.

Oh, and the night, the night, when the wind full of space

wears out our faces – whom would she not stay for,

the longed-for, gentle, disappointing one, whom the solitary heart

with difficulty stands before. Is she less heavy for lovers?

Ah, they only hide their fate between themselves.

Do you not know yet? Throw the emptiness out of your arms

to add to the spaces we breathe; maybe the birds

will feel the expansion of air, in more intimate flight.

Yes, the Spring-times needed you deeply. Many a star

must have been there for you so you might feel it. A wave

lifted towards you out of the past, or, as you walked

past an open window, a violin

gave of itself. All this was their mission.

But could you handle it? Were you not always,

still, distracted by expectation, as if all you experienced,

like a Beloved, came near to you? (Where could you contain her,

with all the vast strange thoughts in you

going in and out, and often staying the night.)

But if you are yearning, then sing the lovers: for long

their notorious feelings have not been immortal enough.

Those, you almost envied them, the forsaken, that you

found as loving as those who were satisfied. Begin,

always as new, the unattainable praising:

think: the hero prolongs himself, even his falling

was only a pretext for being, his latest rebirth.

But lovers are taken back by exhausted Nature

into herself, as if there were not the power

to make them again. Have you remembered

Gastara Stampa sufficiently yet, that any girl,

whose lover has gone, might feel from that

intenser example of love: ‘Could I only become like her?’

Should not these ancient sufferings be finally

fruitful for us? Isn’t it time that, loving,

we freed ourselves from the beloved, and, trembling, endured

as the arrow endures the bow, so as to be, in its flight,

something more than itself? For staying is nowhere.

Voices, voices. Hear then, my heart, as only

saints have heard: so that the mighty call

raised them from the earth: they, though, knelt on

impossibly and paid no attention:

such was their listening. Not that you could withstand

God’s voice: far from it. But listen to the breath,

the unbroken message that creates itself from the silence.

It rushes towards you now, from those youthfully dead.

Whenever you entered, didn’t their fate speak to you,

quietly, in churches in Naples or Rome?

Or else an inscription exaltedly impressed itself on you,

as lately the tablet in Santa Maria Formosa.

What do they will of me? That I should gently remove

the semblance of injustice, that slightly, at times,

hinders their spirits from a pure moving-on.

It is truly strange to no longer inhabit the earth,

to no longer practice customs barely acquired,

not to give a meaning of human futurity

to roses, and other expressly promising things:

no longer to be what one was in endlessly anxious hands,

and to set aside even one’s own

proper name like a broken plaything.

Strange: not to go on wishing one’s wishes. Strange

to see all that was once in place, floating

so loosely in space. And it’s hard being dead,

and full of retrieval, before one gradually feels

a little eternity. Though the living

all make the error of drawing too sharp a distinction.

Angels (they say) would often not know whether

they moved among living or dead. The eternal current

sweeps all the ages, within it, through both the spheres,

forever, and resounds above them in both.

Finally they have no more need of us, the early-departed,

weaned gently from earthly things, as one outgrows

the mother’s mild breast. But we, needing

such great secrets, for whom sadness is often

the source of a blessed progress, could we exist without them?

Is it a meaningless story how once, in the grieving for Linos,

first music ventured to penetrate arid rigidity,

so that, in startled space, which an almost godlike youth

suddenly left forever, the emptiness first felt

the quivering that now enraptures us, and comforts, and helps.

73 thoughts on “peace

  1. Sweet Katy,
    Such a journey, with so much love….
    Life is eternal, and love is immortal,
    and death is only a horizon;
    and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight.
    ~Rossiter Worthington Raymond
    Hugs my sweet friend…


  2. Katy – My heart goes out to you. May Scott’s memory be for a blessing. He left during the most auspicious time when the gates of heaven are open to hear our voices. The Rilke poem was so fitting and profound. I cannot wait to give you big hugs in person.


  3. Katy, my thoughts and prayers are with you this morning. Thank you for sharing this journey of hope and strength and love and joy and sorrow with all of us. It is the journey of life that we all go through but few can articulate it as beautifully and generously as you and Scott have done.

    Mark read the post before I did, and when he came upstairs to tell me with tears in his eyes, I was at that moment thinking of you seeing your beloved dogs again and imagining the joy in that reunion.


  4. Katy – sending you love light and comfort. Try to get some rest now knowing that you helped Scott achieve his goal. It has been a privilege and honor to follow the journey you both took together. ❤


  5. God Bless you, Katy. What a remarkable display of true LOVE you have shown throughout Scott’s transition.
    You are an inspiration to us all. We send our deepest sympathies but know in our hearts that Scott is free to fly with the angels now in a limitless form.
    Much love to you and all your friends in India.

    xxDario and Natasha


  6. Dear Katy, I am so sorry for your lose. Both of you certainly fought the good fight. All of your past messages have been very inspiring for all of us.

    Best Regards, Mark Silver Oggetti 305-343-7663


  7. The journey

    Tourists come to enjoy
    But he came to fight his last battle
    Which we all have to one day
    Face the ultimate terror
    The death

    He put up his fight
    When he was at his weakest
    And won it

    Many may forget him
    But the air ,the sun ,the sea , the waves, the hills
    Will not

    May be one day we shall meet him again
    Because we all have to go
    Where he is now

    Our journey never ends
    Only the place changes


  8. Hello Sweet One,
    I am deeply moved by your journey and Scott’s.
    Humbled by such a generous manifestation of love you shared with all of us. Come home now to your puppies and your apples and your island. We will hold you and care for you while you heal and gain back your strength, your self. I feel Scott yo be at peace. Love you. Iana xooxxoxoooo


  9. Dearest Katy,
    I am here for you, my dream sister and friend in any way you want or need. You can come here or if you prefer, I can get on a plane. I will also help take care of you as you heal to reveal the love that help shape you on this arduous journey. Many Scott’s smile shine on all of us and especially bless you my dear friend. I love you.
    Big warm hug..xooxox


  10. Scott was a true inspiration to many and will be greatly missed but he has left a wonderful legacy of inspiration, determination and helping others to help them smile to the end just as Scott did.

    Katy it’s now time to take out those hugs you have both been storing in the treasure chest and wrap them around you for comfort and love. You are a true Angel xxx


  11. RIP Scott. Katy, Barb and I are so sorry for your loss. I first met Scott in 2010 at the Delhi Reunion in DC, and we bid on and won a stay with you and Scott on Deer Isle. He was one of a kind. We have fond memories of our visit with you and Scott.


  12. Sending deepest condolences from Yangon and love and strength to you. The time you and Scott have shared so generously with us, has been enriching and inspiring. Scott’s legacy is precious and knowing you both is something to treasure.


  13. I never met Scott or you Katy, but have followed your journey for almost a year-
    I have learned a lot about the two of you and for that I am thankful-but more than that I have learned even more about love, life, commitment ,
    and doing what your heart calls you to do. Thank for the lessons of life and living.
    Some long breaths are in order Katy-
    You are close at heart and we send love and light…Blessings, Pat and Tom


  14. Katy, thank you so very much for sharing all of this with us. You and Scott were so lucky to have found each other. I know there must be a huge gap in your circle right now which will eventually be filled in with those who love you. Namaste.


  15. Reblogged this on jeanniek2013's Blog and commented:
    Though nothing can bring back the hour
    Of splendor in the grass
    Or glory in the flower
    Weep not
    Rather find strength in what remains behind…

    A beautiful man, a beautiful love story
    A beautiful journey
    Sorry for your loss Katy
    You are one very strong woman and a very lucky one to have had such a spectacular man in your life and a love that very few ever ever find


  16. Though nothing can bring back the hour Of splendor in the grass Or glory in the flower Weep not Rather find strength in what remains behind… A beautiful man, a beautiful love story A beautiful journey Sorry for your loss Katy You are one very strong woman and a very lucky one to have had such a spectacular man in your life and a love that very few ever ever find


  17. hi katy,
    i started reading this blog on the 10th of september and was attracted by the simple ideals of scott and the simplicity and clarity that both of you shared.
    i wish that there be many more scott’s and katy’s that this world witnesses in order to make it a more loving and compassionate world.
    Thank you for sharing your journey and please keep blogging to keep us updated of your well being.
    May he rest in eternal peace


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