thin man goes to goa /season 62 final episode (c) scott morgan 2013
Six months ago today Scott was in the hospital at UNC Chapel Hill getting the results of his colonoscopy emergency biopsy. The surgeon told him he had Stage IV matasticized stomach cancer, inoperable, nothing we can do, go home and get your affairs in order. She also told him–and later his oncologist confirmed–he had 2 to 4 months to live. Scott wasted no time in setting his end game plan in motion. A farewell party was held in High Point the very next night because a majority of his friends ( including big sis Lindy) were in town for the furniture market week.
The first two weeks were a blur of shock, intense emotions, and frantic-yet-focused activity: we were going to goa so that Scott would be able to die with dignity in his beloved India in a tranquil setting unencumbered by the directives of the US healthcare and legal systems. We had 150 friends show up for the party, we had another 50 in and out throughout the ten last days in High Point. It was a full 58 hours before there was an intimate chunk of time available for us to discuss with just each other what was happening, what we were feeling, where we were going. It was clear from the start, with houseguests arriving daily, that unlike most people who withdraw into their private cocoons when receiving this kind of bad news, Scott’s larger-than-life personality meant this overwhelming experience would be shared. We deliberately opened it up further by blogging about it.
Hundreds of friends from every juncture of Scott’s richly textured life (including two exwives who traveled to High Point to spend time with him), 1397 blog followers as of this writing, hoteliers who quickly embraced us as family joined our actual family in supporting us both while we embarked on Scott’s last adventure. We didn’t know the public would embrace us when we began this blog but it turns out Scott’s story has universal application, inspiring people for many different reasons. The story is one of courage, strength, originality, creativity, love and commitment. And endurance.
On this half year anniversary we are most grateful that Scott has already greatly exceeded the doctors’ predictions. There have been numerous ups and downs and this past week has been challenging, the past few nights very tough. Last night Scott said to me I feel like I have two different bodies, one from the neck up and one from the neck down. And while the plumbing is still working, the pipes are rusted at best. There is breakthrough pain that makes eating and sleeping and well anything a chore. We have a cornucopia of pain killers. So…. I am shutting down. What?! You heard me: I am shutting down.
He put his fave 60’s rock band Spirit‘s “Give a Life, Take a Life” on iTunes and their haunting refrain …now I’m thinking the ship is sinking, and I’m scared, you have the right to take my life away… and listened to this beautiful song repeatedly. We’ve listened to this album hundreds of times over the 8 years we’ve been together and now the lyrics….well, you get the idea, don’t you? I went to bed, not because I was tired but because the fountain of sorrow cannot be allowed to flow yet. I need to be here now. I didn’t come this far to send Scott adrift with a leaky liferaft, did I? Later Scott woke me up at 4 AM and we opened the door to the moonless night in order to hear the pounding waves better. He sent out this email and then he decided to share it here:
From: scott morgan
Date: April 13, 2013, 3:33:18 AM GMT+05:
shutting. down. quite qkly here. losing. plumbing battle….
katy. grt. art work at standstill…rt now
spirit,little slow,heart beating. mind. sharp
body falling apart,keep me in e mailz
send photos. please…need to. hear. from all
liftsmy spirit. every e mail……..
Today. six. mo. anniv. since lft hosp w bad newz
body is. crumbling,no food intake three dayz
tired,n. getting. weaker. very. tuff time. rt. now……..sending huge hugz
Sent from my heart…..